Wednesday, August 27, 2008

OUTSIDE LANDS-San Francisco, CA August '08

For the first time San Francisco had it's own three day music festival within city limits. I went the three days and wrote three stories for Remezcla that you can read here. So, since I've already done it, I won't talk much about the music itself in this post. These are just some moments my camera captured while trying to do my press coverage of the event.

How convenient was to set up this huge tent where instead of having an ongoing rave (as I first thought) they put laptops with free Internet access so these three morons can go and update their Facebook status to "in Outside Lands". (The third moron was myself)

I always wondered, at what moment of the process of getting ready to go to a concert these jerks think "oh, I should take the flag of the stupid country I escaped from," before or after the sunscreen? Do Americans living abroad take American flags when they go to concerts too? Dude, I am from that same stupid country and I see that flag, all I wanna do is be as far as I can from you and your peeps.

For example: instead of bringing a flag from Moronland, Mr. Artschool Confidential here brought some balloons and a couple of Star Wars toys to play in between bands.

Here, let's teach those beaners how is it done!

So I finally got to see Radiohead (the most overrated band since The Beatles) live and I was able to figure out why all these wimpsters claim it's the best band in the world: all that guy does is whine! If I had no balls, no personality, and no talent he would be my idol too.

Epic: summer dress and Convers shoes. Finally ONE woman who was not wearing sandals!

Because this is what happens to women who wear sandals to concerts. Even if you had pretty feet (which only a few few people do) having them look like this, makes you completely unfuckable (doesn't matter if you look like Rosario Dawson from the ankles up).

And these are the leg-warmers that Eskimo strippers were over there in Alaska.

I already said this in this same blog a few posts below: Rupa is the hottest San Francisco artist right now and you should check her out before she blows up to international proportions.

This is the type of chicks that bi-curious guys date right before they turn totally gay. It's a way of subconsciously lying to yourself so you can say "at least I tried, now I know for sure that I'm all about the cock".

Having mixed-race kids is like a medal of coolness that you can wear on yourself till they are like 12 or so. Take them to concerts with you, even if they hate that grown-up music they can still show off their/your coolness entering every wacky contest.

What ever happened to "two turntables and a microphone"? Nowadays every other rapper thinks that he can be The Roots and play their originally-sample-based music with a live back-up band. Lupe you are a total Fiasco.

You noticed how nowadays when you go to a hip-hop show they provide you with free interactive games? For example, you and your friends can play "where is Waldo?" trying to find the ONE black person in the crowd. You get bonus if it happens to be a girl and double bonus if she's hot. I so won this time!

Hey, Ethan, do you really think we'll pass for Latinos during with Café Tacvba concert by wearing this ridiculous shit? I totally wanna score some of that brown poontang!

This is the main reason most young men want to become rockstars. Where else an ugly motherfucker like that can get all these women actually wanting to hug him?

Alfajores, snif...

If the festival had been in Southern California (Indio, to say one random place) 90 percent of the women would look exactly like her. Here, she was the only blonde on bikini top among a 60 thousands crowd.

I'm sorry for all you proud Mexi-rockers but the hottest Mexican rock act, doesn't come from TJ, DF or Monterrey, they come straight outta Dublin.

Now this I don't understand. This woman was walking around with this homemade flag with a picture of herself smiling. OK, maybe it wasn't herself, maybe it was her dead sister or someone who really wanted to come to the festival and couldn't. But wouldn't have been enough to make one of those ghetto R.I.P. t-shirts and pour a 40 on the asphalt?


Carlos Reyes said...

Oh, I really dig Radiohead, never seen them live though.. and I do find them overrated (since they're supposed to be the best band out there)

And what are u talking about? The lead Tacubo is so hot! hahha.. lol.. just kidding.

WTF is Alfajores? Gotta google that.

And that flag.. I might just put it in a collection of "naco" pics the brother has... lol

Lorena said...

omg- radiohead at outside lands made me want to cut myself! i didn't even stay around to see if they played one of two songs i was looking forward to. naturally manu chao is a difficult act to follow...